Furious Enjoyment + 11-Minute Meditation

How to find a broad “yes" in the middle of a thousand specific "nos."

Click above for this week’s guided meditation

“Hard times require furious dancing”
— Alice Walker

Hey friends.

Alice Walker knows. When times are tough, enjoyment and celebration are paramount. Both to interrupt our feedback loops of stress and interpersonal dysfunction, to express our feelings about all of it, and – sometimes – to transform it.

Image Caption: Unai Huizi

We also need enjoyment for its own sake. I mean, what’s the point of existing if we can’t find the good in it?

My koan lately has been: Where is the pleasure in this activity, right now? I don’t mean some bland all-purpose contentment, although that would be nice (God bless the once-born temperament). I’m after something specific to the activity or situation itself, something that speaks honestly to the fruits of my engagement.

Dancing around my living room with my six-year-old is an obvious pleasure. I can see the catharsis in his fierce little Iggy Pop moves, this opportunity to move his feelings into the space around him. For me, too. Such a relief. Everything feels different afterwards. Looser, easier. More connected.

What about the subtler pleasures – like reading? Sitting in my easy chair, a Hudson Bay (RIP) blanket around my shoulders, candle flickering at my side and Sofia Samatar’s A Stranger in Olandria propped on my lap. When I inquire, “Where is the pleasure, here?” certain aspects of my experience become clear: the feeling of the outer world thinning as I become focally absorbed in her narrative; champagne bubbles of insight from a fresh turn of phrase; the intellectual satisfaction of spending time in a strange new world with its own integrity and internal coherence. And, always, the two-way gift of my trust in the writer, which allows me to truly surrender.

Becoming conscious of these dynamics deepens the pleasure of my reading. I can feel them. And the inquiry has the secondary benefit of helping me notice what’s getting in the way of that: say, guilt that I should be doing something busy or productive, or (with a different writer) resistance to the voice or the quality of the writing, which means I withhold trust, thus lessening my enjoyment. Jeff: either fully commit, or choose a different book!

Whatever the activity or situation, the practice is to ask, “Where is the pleasure in it?” Or if “pleasure” is too ambitious, where is the satisfaction, or, maybe, the rightness? Walking down the street, is it found in the pleasure of exertion, or the sensual roll of the hips, or maybe in the background novelty of scenery tracking by? How about in a conversation? Is it in the sense of presence and connection (and where in the body do we feel these things?), or maybe in the enjoyment of discovering and following someone else’s logic?

What about during uncomfortable activities? Can I find enjoyment when I’m doing some bullshit administrative task? What might that even be like? Or how about when I’m in conflict with someone, or when I read some terrible piece of news? When I ask my question at these times (however blasphemous it may feel to inquire), what’s fascinating is that I notice not enjoyment, but acceptance. A sudden clear feeling of the bittersweetness of life, the sense that my heartbreak or my outrage or my exhaustion is exactly appropriate, and sometimes, along with these feelings, a fierce desire to respond. We’d never call this enjoyment. But we might call it “yes,” a broad “yes” surrounding a thousand specific “nos.” We might call it, “I’m here for this, too.”

Enough theory. Let’s put it into practice. This simple guided meditation is about uncovering enjoyment in – and bringing enjoyment to – this exact moment, whatever’s happening, on its very own terms.

Much love,
Jeff.

A few quick notes—

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Meditate, Relate and Creatively Self-Regulate: A Retreat for Neurodivergent Humans

July 16-19, 2026
Art of Living North Carolina

This retreat is about not being the only weirdo in the room. Everyone here will be the weirdo in the room! -Including your two teachers, Jeff Warren and Ofosu Jones-Quartey (Born I). What unifies us is the sense that our brains are wired differently, and those differences have brought both real challenges and real creative opportunities. I’ll say more about this fun retreat next week!