Home Base with Jeff Warren
Hey Jeff
I Don't Feel Like Meditating
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I Don't Feel Like Meditating

The anti-meditation meditation

This column is called “Hey Jeff”, where I share a meditation in response to someone’s unique situation, challenge, or curiosity.

In this month’s instalment, I respond to Lucy’s question about sometimes not wanting to meditate. Below is her short note, shared with permission.

Jeff

Painting by Home Base community member Helen Burgess

Lucy: I really enjoy meditations that acknowledge that feeling where you sit to meditate and you don’t really want to do it. You just feel bummed about something and you sit and then you quiet your mind and a still small voice of calm creeps in.


Hi Lucy,

I appreciate the patience and compassion in what you describe. The trust that sitting with your bummed-outness can sometimes make space for something else.

Anytime we don’t feel like meditating there is always the possibility that our body is telling us something important, like sitting down inside an anxious brain might lead to more anxiety. Some other activity — exercising, talking to a friend, having a nap — could be more appropriate. Learning to recognize and honour those quieter body signals is one of the fruits of a meditation practice.

And, I’ve also found that not feeling like meditating … can be one of the best times to meditate. Truly. In fact, not feeling like doing anything is a great time to meditate. Not feeling like reading a book, or being present, or talking to someone — these big aversions and subtler ‘blahs’ are all opportunities to ask, if we have the wherewithal:

What actually is the problem here?

What’s coming between me and life being … OK in this moment?

Something is. I don’t mean some external situation — although of course those will be there. I mean some internal situation. Some conviction that things need to be otherwise. This often has an echo in the body: a jangly discontent, a flatland dullness, a violent aversion, a set line of the mouth. If we can notice that conviction — wherever in the body it lives — we can sometimes free ourselves from its truth claims. And that relief can be profound.

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